A Dish Made in Heaven

Here is a one-act play that I've just written for one of my literature classes at Our Lady of Holy Cross College.  It seems an appropriate fit for my blog, so please, enjoy. AM

A Dish Made in Heaven (A one-act play)

Characters:

Hungrietta (a hungry girl)                                          Spaghetti (delicious)

Lasagna (delicious but complicated)                         Russet Mash (very soft and comforting)

Chip (fast and easy)                                                 Salade (very healthy)

Setting:

The home of Hungrietta.  After a lifetime friendship, she has fallen in love with Spaghetti, who loves her back. 

Scene I

Hungrietta:  (stands at stove)  Oh, Spaghetti.  I've always loved you, and tonight I can't help but think I will want you forever.

Spaghetti:  (steaming)  I feel the same way about you, Hungrietta.  All I want is to satisfy you.  I don't expect much, just a pot of boiling water and a little ground turkey and tomato sauce.  You make me so happy.  Let's get married.

Hungrietta:  Yes!  Oh, yes, Spaghetti.  I will marry you.  We can be so happy together.  I know that we'll never be apart.  We shall become one.  Let's do it tonight.

Spaghetti:  Tonight?  Of course!  Why wait?  I'm easy.  You can have me within the hour!

Scene II

{Hungrietta sits on the couch with Chip, watching TV.  Enter Spaghetti.}

Spaghetti:  (angrily)  What's going on here?

Hungrietta:  Oh, Spaghetti.  You're a little early.

Spaghetti:  Really?  It looks as though I'm here just in time.  I'll ask again.  What's going on here?

Hungrietta:  It meant nothing!  I was just feeling...so...needy, and you weren't ready yet. 

Spaghetti:  I was only going to take an hour!!

Hungrietta:  I know!  I just... I just couldn't wait.

Chip:  Hey, man.  She just needed a little bit to tide her over.  It's not like I'm the main deal or anything.  She always ends up with you.  She just uses me to get to you.

Spaghetti:  You've ruined EVERYTHING!  How can we be joined together when you've been having somebody else?

Hungrietta:  Oh, Spaghetti, forgive me, please!  It was just a little bit.  He didn't even satisfy me.  You're the one I really want.

Spaghetti:  I don't know, Hungrietta.  I feel so betrayed.

{exeunt all}

Scene III

{The next day, at the breakfast table.  Hungrietta sits down to eat her eggs with a friend, Russet Mash.}

Russet Mash:  So, what did he say?

Hungrietta:  (sobbing) He said he couldn't be with me after I'd had somebody else.  I don't know what to do, Russet.  I can't live without him.  I have to have my Spaghetti.

Russet Mash:  He's just too hot right now, but he'll cool off.  You know he loves you.

Hungrietta:  I don't know.  He was SO angry.  What will I do?

Russet Mash:  Well, if he does leave you, there's always Lasagna.

Hungrietta:  Ugh!  That drama queen?  He's so high maintenance!  I'd have to spend the rest of my life working twice as hard for essentially the same result. 

Russet Mash:  But you know he looks so good!  Even if their flavors are the same, his presentation is really something, you must admit.

Hungrietta:  It's not always about LOOKS, Russet!  Spaghetti is comfortable.  I know I can be myself with him.  Lasagna always has to have things just so.  It's exhausting.  The perfectly coiffed noodles, the layers.  Don't even get me started on the cheesiness.  I mean, sometimes I don't want to deal with all that cheesiness.

Russet Mash:  Well, you just hang in there.  Whatever happens, I'll be here to comfort you.  You know that.

Hungrietta:  Thanks, Russet.  That means a lot to me.  I know I can always count on you.  

Scene IV

{Back in the kitchen, Hungrietta, Spaghetti and Chip are trying to work things out.}

Chip:  Hungrietta, you know I love you, even though you keep leaving me coming back to me.  I'm willing to accept your love on whatever level you let me.  I don't care, as long as I'm a part of your life.

Hungrietta:  Chip, you know that's not going to work.  You're no good for me.  You're just so hard to resist.  Sometimes I feel so weak.  (to Spaghetti) And that's all that happened the other night, my dearest Spaghetti.  I was weak.  I still love you best.

Spaghetti:  I'm not angry anymore.  I just wonder if you can resist the urge in the future.  If we get married, how do I know you won't be weak again?

Hungrietta:  You don't.  You'll just have to trust that our love will satisfy me enough that I won't need Chip anymore.

Chip:  Hey, I'm right here, you know.

Hungrietta:  Sorry, Chip, but you know this is the truth.  I need someone more substantial.  What we've had is fun, but it's not meant to last.  It was only a fling.. or two.. or seven.  You don't even usually last that long, but the damage stays with me.  What we have is a toxic relationship.

Chip:  If you feel that way, then maybe I should leave!

Hungrietta:  That's probably best.  Goodbye, Chip.  And good luck!

{Chip, crushed, storms out.}

Hungrietta:  Now, Spaghetti, you need to decide.  Are we going to become one, or do I have to give up on you.  I want you to be a part of me.

Spaghetti:  Oh, Hungrietta, darling.  I love you so much.  We shall be together.

{A knock is heard at the door.  Hungrietta answers it.}

Salade:  Good evening, Ma'am.  Sorry to disturb you, but we've had reports of some unhealthy activity in this neighborhood.  I'm here to find out if you've seen someone described as white, salty, generally round and prone to cracking up...answers to the name of Chip.

Hungrietta:  (Looks at Spaghetti, gasps) 

The End

Sneaky Smoothies

Now that summer is in full swing, that blender is looking mighty good with all its icy smoothie potential.  My son loves smoothies at home.  Smoothies can be healthy or not depending on what you put in them.  For me, they're an excellent way to sneak nutritious fruit and vegetables into our diet without really noticing, because many veggies are completely unrecognizable in a fruit smoothie.  My favorite starters are frozen strawberries and apple juice, and I get more creative from there.  This morning, I felt green, leafy vegetables were in order, but who wants a salad for breakfast?  Not I.

Sneaky Smoothie

1-1/2 cups frozen strawberries
1 cup apple juice
handful fresh leaf spinach
1/8 cup grenadine (or 2 tsp fructose, or a tablespoon of agave nectar for a healthier alternative, or blackstrap molasses for an iron boost, or just skip the sugar)

Blend on slow speed for about 20-30 seconds, pour into a glass and love it.

So many combinations make delicious smoothies: mangos, papayas, peaches, blueberries.  If you can find it in the frozen fruit or fresh produce area, try putting it in a smoothie.  As the old adage says: "Try it; you'll like it." I've used celery before, too, a natural diuretic, which is great the day after a salty boiled crawfish binge. ;)

Addendum to "No Breads..."

I forgot to mention that I did use a large pinch of xantham gum in the dry ingredients.  This helps keep the whole thing from crumbling apart since we don't have the sticky gluten to do that for us.  Sorry about that.

AM

No Breads for the Sickies

The title is just a dorky twist on "no rest for the wicked," but it sums up how I feel sometimes.  Good-tasting bread that is celiac friendly is not easy to come by, or to make.  I had a hankering for some bread today, so I peeked in the fridge to see what I had to work with.  As it happened, I had brown rice flour and potato starch but no corn flour or anything else.  Well, this is a blog about using what you've got, so here it went.

DISCLAIMER: I didn't actually measure ANYTHING. (note to self: start measuring stuff)
I used about 2 cups of brown rice flour and another 1/2 cup of potato starch.  I threw in about 5 teaspoons of baking  powder, at least 2 tablespoons of powdered egg white, maybe 3 teaspoons of salt, and stirred that all together to make sure it was evenly mixed.  Then I added 1/2 cup canola oil and 3/4 cup of almond milk (unsweetened) and about 1/4 cup of apple cider vinegar.  I mixed it until it was all wet but thick (like peanut butter), then added water until it was the consistency of thick cake batter.  I spread some oil in the bread loaf pan and poured in the batter, scraping the sides of the mixing bowl.  I put it in the oven, preheated to 350 degrees Fahrenheit, and baked it for close to an hour.  While it baked, the center puffed up like a sweet bread, and I checked several times for a dry center.  When I began to smell the bread from another room, I covered it loosely with foil to keep the top from burning.

I was hoping the vinegar would give it a little sourdough type taste, but it really didn't make any difference.  Maybe next time I'll use more.

It turned out to be pretty tasty.  I'm getting used to chunky, thick bread, since that's the best one can hope for on a gluten-free diet, but at least the flavor is getting better.  On a stormy summer day like today, a good piece of bread with a little butter tastes good.

Bon appetit.

December 12, 2010 Christmas Party Food

This year, I was invited to a Christmas party for, I believe, the first time since I started working from home.  I used to go to several every year because the company would have a party, co-workers would have parties, my little boy's daycare would have a party.  Ever since I started working remotely for an out-of-state company, and my son grew up, there just haven't been too many of those occasions.  Since I don't like to show up empty handed to a party, I decided to make an appetizer. 

I had half a large pack of extra lean turkey bacon that needed to be used, so I decided something to do with bacon would be a good use for it.  I experimented with bacon-wrapped mozzarella (which melted right out of the bacon).  I tried cornbread discs topped with mozzarella, wrapped with bacon, and that was okay but really time consuming. I even tried baby carrots wrapped in bacon, which really didn't appeal to me at all.  In all these experiments, the flavor was fair, but the texture was all wrong.  Extra lean turkey bacon just doesn't get crispy, no matter how long you cook it, unless you char it.

So, let me admit right here that my final choice was not something that happened to be in the fridge, but the idea was!  I searched the web for ideas to do with bacon and finally found one that appealed to me.  At this point, however, I was out of the extra lean turkey bacon, which wasn't working very well anyway.  I had to go out and get some regular fat turkey bacon and a sack of potatoes (I was out of potatoes, too).

Here's what I used:
small red potatoes
turkey bacon
salt
olive oil
ground rosemary, dill weed
granulated garlic
*toothpicks

Here's what I did:

Wash and slice about 15 small-ish red potatoes (larger ones would probably make better slices, but I really like the small ones). I sliced them lengthwise for "steak fries" size chunks (although you can cube them and get the same flavor in a different shape, but you'll want to cut the bacon differently if you do).

In a large microwave-safe bowl cover potatoes with water, shake in some salt and cover with plastic wrap.  Microwave for 5-6 minutes, depending on your microwave (less time if it's more powerful, more time if it's a wimp).  You want to undercook them ever so slightly because they're going to finish cooking later.

Drain and rinse potatoes.  Toss with about a tablespoon of olive oil, ground rosemary, granulated garlic, ground dill weed and a little bit more salt.  Set aside.

Meanwhile, open your turkey bacon and re-slice each slice lengthwise (for long skinny pieces).

Spread two large cookie sheets with aluminum foil and spray with cooking spray (it's going to get sticky).

Now here's the fun part (read: tedious).  Wrap each potato slice with one strand of bacon so that it looks striped, a bit like a small candy cane.  *You  probably won't need toothpicks since the bacon will sort of stretch around the potato, but if you find your ends popping off, use toothpicks to hold them on.

Place them on the pans as you wrap them, then bake at 400 F for about 15 minutes one side, then flip and bake the other side another 10 minutes.

When you take them out, the bacon will be baked onto the potatoes, and your house will smell like IHOP.  My dogs were going nuts while this was going on, and they got to enjoy a few "mistakes."

To serve, I chose a Vidalia onion dressing that I found at Rouse's.  It was a little sweet, which was a really nice contrast to the salty bacon and potatoes.  If this sounds like a little slice of heart attack, just remember, turkey bacon is naturally much leaner than pork bacon, and we used olive oil, which is heart healthy.  Feel better?

By the way, once the plate was served at the party, it was a huge hit, wiped out in record time, and I was beaming.

November 28, 2010 Leftover Turkey

After Thanksgiving, what happens to all that leftover turkey?  Do you have turkey sandwiches for weeks?  Do you have to incorporate turkey into every meal until it's gone?  Do you feed it to the dog? Do you make soup?


Well, I have found a better way.  Rather than get absolutely sick of that leftover turkey, I took my mom's advice.

I finished taking all the meat off the bones.  Then one at a time I took a square piece of foil, topped it with a square piece of wax paper, then placed a heap of the turkey meat on top. 

 

I folded both layers to wrap around the turkey and folded the edges.

Then I placed the pack into a Ziploc bag.  I did this until the turkey was all wrapped up and put the bag in the freezer.

Just to test it, today for lunch I took one pack out, removed the foil and heated up the turkey to see how it had fared in the freezer.  It was just as delicious as it had been before freezing.  Now I have individual serving sizes of turkey whenever I want it.  All I have to do is take it out of the freezer and heat it up.

Today my job is boiling the rest of the carcass for soup.  I haven't decided yet whether it will be gumbo or plain old turkey soup.  And since I don't believe in wasting, all the cartilage and skin left over after boiling will be much appreciated by my dogs (NO bones; they're dangerous for dogs).

November 22, 2010 Blueberry Muffins

I love to bake.  Going gluten free hasn't changed that.  As a matter of fact, it only made me more determined to bake the most delicious stuff in the healthiest way possible.  I had an envie for blueberry muffins over the weekend, so I made some.  Lucky for me, I had every ingredient I needed in the fridge/freezer/pantry.

*Hint for Bakers:  My oven runs too hot.  I learned this by trial and error (lots of burnt cookies).  So when I bake, I know I have to adjust the baking temperature for my oven.  If the recipe says 400, I set mine at 350.

Blueberry Muffins (gluten free)

2 cups brown rice flour
1/3 cup sugar
3 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon xantham gum
1 egg
1/3 cup canola oil
3/4 cup rice milk (or almond, or soy, or even real milk if you prefer)
1 teaspoon orange zest (finely grated orange skin--gives it a great tangy flavor)
1 cup blueberries (either fresh OR thawed and rinsed frozen blueberries)
*Large granule sugar (such as Sugar in the Raw or decorating sugar) 

Preheat oven to 400.  Mix dry ingredients together.  Mix wet ingredients together.  Mix dry ingredients with wet ingredients.  Stir in blueberries and orange zest.  Pour into muffin cups full, very close to the top edge.  *Top with large-granule sugar. Bake at 400 for 15-20 minutes.  If you use mini-muffins, bake them for less time, regular size or large muffin tins, bake longer.  If you stick a toothpick in the middle and it comes out dry, they're done.  Remove and let cool.  Enjoy.

November 7, 2010 - Perfect Soup Weather

Yesterday while driving around running errands, I was listening to one of NPR's food programs.  They were talking about the first cold snap being the best time to make soup, and a suggestion was made that when making your soup, you should brown your vegetables first, to extract the most flavor from them.  I took that advice.

WHTBITF Vegetable Soup
Ingredients on hand:
1 fresh onion and about 1/4 cup dried onions
1 cup frozen chopped broccoli
3/4 cup frozen green beans (that's all I had left)
1 cup green onions
1/4 cup minced garlic
4 whole carrots, chopped
about 2 cups frozen cabbage stock
2 cups stewed cabbage
12-oz pack of white (navy) beans
7 small red potatoes peeled
1.5 cups cooked brown rice
1 pound smoked turkey sausage
2 frozen chicken breast fillets
Salt, dried parsley cumin and sage

First, I put the frozen stock and cabbage in the pot to get it boiling, then threw in the white beans.  While that was going on, I made sure all the veggies were chopped and put them in a large pan to brown in olive oil.  Once they were all nicely browned, they went into the pot.  I added the potatoes and brown rice after that, and had to add about a quart of water because it was getting very thick at that point.  I sliced up the sausage and threw it in.  I thawed and then seasoned and browned the chicken breasts in the large pan.  When they were cooked, I chopped them up and put them in the pot.  Once everything was in the pot, I just had to stir every now and then and wait for the beans to be thoroughly cooked.  While it was all at a rolling boil, I added salt (I didn't measure, just took the salt canister and waved it 3 or 4 times), cumin (again, about 4 or 5 shakes right into the pot), sage (the equivalent of maybe 3 pinches), and a handful of dried parsley flakes.  The big pot was full up to the rim.

The smell was heavenly once it was all boiling, and once the beans were tender, it was ready to eat.  It was WAY better than I expected it to be, so flavorful!  Come on over and have a bowl.  There's too much for me to finish by myself.

September 10, 2010 Oh, RUM BALLS!!

My new favorite expletive.  It's fun to say now, especially since a new series of men's soap commercials made me laugh out loud.

I looked all over my cookbooks and the internet to find a rum ball recipe, ANY rum ball recipe.  My cookbooks failed me, but I was lucky enough to find several different recipes online, even some that were gluten free.  Unfortunately, every one of them was different, and I couldn't decide which one to use, so I used all of them.  Some of them called for corn syrup, something I didn't have in the fridge (or cupboard), so I went with the ones that didn't.  Then I whittled the recipes down to how much actual work I wanted to do, which was very little.  Here is what I finally came up with, and it was delicious:

I used Betty Crocker Gluten Free Devil's Food Cake Mix, and prepared it the way the box said to.  I added about 1/2 cup of gluten-free, dairy free chocolate chips made by Enjoy Life (an allergy-friendly company) after it had baked a little bit so they sort of melted into the cake as it baked.  (I REALLY enjoyed taste testing this after it was cooked.)

After the cake was done and cooled a little bit, it was time for the rum.  One recipe called for 1/4 cup of rum.  That just didn't feel right to me, so I put more.  Don't ask me how much, because it was Captain Morgan's Spiced Rum and it tasted pretty good, so I stopped measuring.  You just have to make sure that you don't over-wet the cake.  I could have used a mixer to beat this together, but I did it by hand with a wire masher, which worked just as well, made less noise and was easier to clean up. 

Once it was all nice and squishy, I scooped it out into balls, rolled the balls in minced walnuts (my first batch didn't have walnuts) and then powdered sugar, and placed them on wax paper on a plate.  This went into the fridge for a while (I'm sure half an hour would be sufficient).  Et voila!  Rum Balls!  Quite satisfactory!

August 26, 2010 Ooooooo, Frankenstein!

There's not much lead up to today's post.  I was hungry.  It was lunchtime.  There was salad.  There was chicken.  I didn't feel like ranch dressing.  Time to perform a quick experiment.  I loved it. 

Today's find:  Quarter-full bottle of Dijon mustard. 

I had a bottle of Dijon mustard in the fridge had about a quarter left.  I poured in enough balsamic vinegar to fill it halfway (so one part to one part each), and then I shook it up vigorously.  This is extremely tangy and wonderful!

Happy lunching.

July 30, 2010 You Can't Be Serious!

People who know me well have heard me ramble on about how many dishes I've broken lately. I joke about it. I say I'm just making room for all my Annedivorcery registry gifts I have coming, but the truth is...I'm clumsy. Other theories include a poltergeist in my house who revels in causing things to fall off counters, tables and even walls, for heaven's sake. It's become rather maddening. If my cabinets were becoming crowded, they won't be that way for long.

I have broken supposedly shatterproof Corningware into millions of tiny shards, glass stemware, tumblers, plates, bowls...even a spoon.  I know, I know, it sounds ridiculous, but it's true.  I actually broke...a...spoon.  In my defense, it was an old spoon, and I was smoothing rice crispy candy down into a pan, but still.

Lucky for me, my mother recently was "forced" to replace all her pots and pans, which meant I got to inherit a lovely set of stainless steel cookware, perfect for replacing all the "Visions" I've destroyed over the years, and especially recently.  I think every cook should rotate his/her cookware every several years.  I just haven't done it in a while.  Now seems as good a time as any.

Today's Find:  Half bag of Marshmallows

Rice Krispies treats (You can get the "recipe" off of any box of Rice Krispies or even marshmallow bags, but it's pretty easy)
10 oz. Marshmallows
3 Tbs Butter or Margarine
6 cups Rice Krispies

Melt butter with marshmallows in the microwave in a large glass bowl (never melt butter in a plastic bowl or you'll end up with fried plastic) about 2 minutes, stir, then nuke 1 more minute.  Stir it up until it becomes fluffy white and creamy.  Add Rice Krispies, stir until all mixed together and then mash down into a cake pan with an oiled spatula.  Once cooled, slice into squares and enjoy.
(Use a plastic knife especially if you used a nonstick pan, because a metal knife would scratch it)

Update

A trip to the grocery store confirms that Rouses did, indeed, stock my dairy-free frozen treats in the ice cream section.  Huzzah to Rouses, and thank you.

July 25, 2010 Long Time No See

It almost looks as though I took the whole month of July off.  Well, from my blog, at least, I guess that's nearly true.  I've been doing some traveling, working and planning for fall, so I haven't spent much time in the kitchen other than making some of the foods I've already posted and some that aren't really all that interesting (baked chicken, steamed broccoli, etc.).

During my vacation travels in California, my mother did most of the cooking.  Since my mom is an AMAZING cook, I would have been a fool to spend any time in the kitchen myself, except to eat.  You just don't say no to that kind of pampering.

I discovered a few more ready-made items to suit my dietary needs, too, but I won't bore you with the details (unless you ask), since they don't really involve cooking. 

Last night, while I was watching "Julie and Julia" for the first time, I got hungry (who wouldn't?) and skipped to the kitchen to see what I could find to munch on.  I've been on vacation, and I like to leave as little as possible in the fridge when I'm away, so there really wasn't that much left in there that was already prepared.  I did have eggs, though, so I decided to make some deviled eggs.

Today's Find:  Eggs

Simple Deviled Eggs
hard-boiled eggs
mayonnaise
minced garlic
paprika
salt, to taste

Once your eggs are hard boiled (at least 2 minutes at a rolling boil) and cooled, peel them, rinse and dry them with a paper towel.  Slice each egg in half and pop the yolks into a medium-size bowl.  For every 2 eggs, add one tablespoon of mayonnaise and 1/2 teaspoon of minced garlic.  If you've boiled 4 eggs, that's 2 tablespoons of mayo and 1 teaspoon of garlic.  If you don't have minced garlic, use garlic powder.  Mix together with a fork.  I'm never willing to mess up my electric beater just for this little bit, but if you feel ambitious or make a large batch, go right ahead.  Beaters make the mixture much fluffier. Add salt to taste, but beware that the mayo will already add salt to the mix.  Scoop the mixture into the egg white halves until it's all gone and sprinkle the tops with paprika.  That's it.

Sometimes I get creative and add other ingredients to the yolk mix, such as taco seasoning or oregano to give it a little ethnic pop, or even tiny tomato slivers for decoration.  Use your imagination.

Try it.  You don't have to wait for a party to have party food, and the next time you go to one, you'll have something delicious to offer.

Donations are welcome, because while I'm writing this, I'm not working.

July 8, 2010: Turkey Burgers

Last night I had a couple of girlfriends over for drinks, food and relaxing conversation.  We had a great time and I prepared a very simple meal: Turkey burgers and salad.  As simple as it may seem to me, not everyone knows how to make a really tasty burger, so I'll share with you what disappeared from my table, even though there was plenty of other stuff to eat (such as hot dogs with fancy buns). 

Today's Find:  Ground Turkey meat (sometimes found frozen in tubes in the grocery store)

Turkey Burgers
1 pound ground turkey meat
1 chopped onion
1 tbsp minced garlic
salt (I estimated this; probably around a teaspoon or two)
Mrs. Dash Table blend (also estimated)
Olive oil (varies)

Mix it all together in a large bowl.  Some people like to use their hands to get it all mixed up.  I prefer to use a spoon.  You can form your patties by hand or, as I do, scoop out 1/3 cup measuring cups of it and squish it down after it's in the pan.  Put enough olive oil in the pan to help keep the burgers from sticking.  Unfortunately, when it comes to turkey meat of any kind, there's no way to prevent all sticking.  It's going to stick to your pan.  Your job is to try to minimize the sticking by keep oil in the bottom of the pan and scraping up your burgers occasionally.  Flip burgers consistently until when you push down on them with your spatula the juice coming out is just clear, bubbly juice.  It should be very hot in the middle.  Sometimes I cut one in half just to make sure there's no pink in there.  I don't think a rare turkey burger would be a good idea.  I was able to get about eight burgers out of this.

I served my turkey burgers with a salad of romaine lettuce, tomatoes, cucumbers, broccoli and strawberry slices, topped off with my own balsamic vinaigrette dressing.  It was delicious and healthy, and everyone loved it.

June 30, 2010 Come on, Christmas!

When I was little, if I was taking too long to do something or get somewhere, my mother would say, "Come on, Christmas."  The meaning was that waiting for Christmas to come always feels like it takes forever.  Yes, I'm slow, and so is my blog.

One thing I'm not slow about is making dinner at the last minute.  Here's one of our favorites with a special twist that I tried tonight.  My mom gave me the basics, and her cooking has always been phenomenal.  Now I put my own touch into the meals I make for myself and my son, and sometimes company.

Today's Find:  A large can of albacore tuna.

Hidden Veggie Tuna Casserole
Cooked, drained and rinsed spaghetti noodles (do this first, since it takes the longest, and set aside)
1/2 onion
1/2 bell pepper
1 large stalk broccoli (florets only)
olive oil
1 large can of albacore tuna, drained
seasoning salt to taste
1/2 cup soy milk (if you use real milk, just be careful to stir, because it sticks to the bottom of the pan)
1/2 cup chicken broth
*fresh tomato, sliced thin

Any casserole I make starts with olive oil with onions and fresh garlic in a large pan on the stove.  The amount of olive oil you use is subjective, and you should judge by how well your veggies are cooking and whether you need to add more as you go.  It's okay to start with a little and add more.

I used 1/2 yellow onion, 1/2 bell pepper and about 5 cloves of fresh garlic, chopped (about 1/4" pieces).  While these were simmering in the olive oil, I also chopped the florets of one big stalk of broccoli very, very small (I used my fabulous Progressive International Manual Food Chopper and Salsa Maker) and added them to the pan.  This is how you hide the healthy benefits of broccoli in delicious taste.  People who aren't very fond of broccoli won't notice, and those who are will love it.  It also makes the color really pop.  My son happens to be a broccoli lover, but he didn't even notice it was in there.


Once the veggies are cooked down sufficiently (the onions are mostly clear), add the tuna, soy milk and chicken broth (for flavor).  Once these are all bubbly, you can turn off the fire and quickly add your noodles and seasoning salt (my favorite is Lawry's) and stir it all up. 

I like to serve mine with little slivers of fresh tomato on top.   Mom would be proud.

June 20, 2010 Banana Poof

Today's Find:  Aging bananas.

Nobody eats the bananas once they turn brown and get a little soft inside, but they're still really good.  If you have two of them, you can make banana bread, and I have a great recipe, but last night I just didn't feel like making it.  Instead, I tried this little experiment.

Slice bananas in wheels and cover the bottom of a small oven-ready dish or pan (if you have little souffle' or custard cups, you can bake individual servings).  Cover with mini marshmallows and drizzle with melted butter (only about a tablespoon or two).  Pop into the oven and bake at 300 degrees for about 15 minutes with foil paper loosely covering it, then 5 minutes without the foil.  The marshmallows should be at least partially melted, but the tops will be a little crunchy.

If you let this cool down, the juice in the bottom will gel slightly.  You can scoop this over ice cream, or if you leave it in the fridge for about half an hour, it's delicious all by itself.  I think I'll try it later with some homemade chocolate syrup on it.

June 25, 2010 No More Tears

This issue, I'm not making food.  Well, I'll be making food later, but that's not what I'm writing about.  This time, I've had a beauty breakthrough.  If you've been reading, you know that I have practically every sensitivity in the known stratosphere, and it runs in the family.

My skin is one of my worst sensitivities.  I turn red at the mere touch of a blade of grass, wearing makeup feels like a glove on my face, and most skin creams and lotions either burn or itch, especially around my eyes.  Because of my airborne allergies, my eyes suffer the worst in the spring and summer and turn into crinkled up tissue paper.  Most cosmetic eye creams burn like crazy or itch so much that I have to wash them off.  The closest I've ever come to a facial moisturizer that didn't make me absolutely miserable was Clinique, but that stuff is expensive.  Nowadays, all cosmetics are expensive.  Petroleum jelly works okay, but it's messy.

I know this sounds really unpleasant, but I have found a solution.

I started thinking that if I'm going to cut myself off from petroleum products, one of them would eventually have to be petroleum jelly, which is pretty much the main ingredient of every commercial beauty product.  I would have to go au naturelle.  Vitamin E oil is mixed with olive oil, which is good and natural, but it's kind of thick and sometimes smells a little strong to put on a face.

Since I love trying new things, I bought a bottle of grapeseed oil recently at Whole Foods in the same aisle as the rest of the vegetable oils, right near the olive oil (I haven't checked Rouses yet, but I will).  I tried this with a cotton swab on my eyelids and found that it was light, smooth to put on and had no scent whatsoever.

Then I tried it along with baking soda as a facial scrub.  It worked very well, even on my scratchy eyelids, and it didn't sting at all!  My skin was smooth, and after rinsing it off, I dried my face and put a very thin rubbing of the grapeseed oil on my eyelids. 

This is a pretty impressive breakthrough for me.  Pass it on to another wimp you know.

June 24, 2010 I'll Take Eight of Those, Please

It's been a busy few days, but I finally have a chance to write again.  Last night I made a short drive to my local grocer, Rouses, where I have found a surprisingly large variety of gluten-free products (to my utter delight).  I needed a few things, and I love to patronize this store because 1) it's a Louisiana-owned business, and 2) they carry more local and Louisiana-made/grown/born products than any other store in the area.  They even carry two--count 'em--TWO brands of prepared roux (you can ask me if you don't know what that is).

I'm even happier than usual with this store since a few days ago I sent them an e-mail from their website (see link above) asking why they didn't carry any non-dairy or soy ice creams.  I figured I'd get some sort of form-letter e-mail saying sorry you're unhappy, blah-blah-blah.  But I didn't!  What I did receive, within a day, was a personal e-mail addressed directly to me by an actual Rouse family member, who informed me that, although soy and rice ice cream were offered in some of their stores, the two closest to me didn't appear to stock them and that she would remedy that as quickly as possible.  She even went so far as to ask me what my favorite flavors were so she could be sure they were stocked.  Wow!

So, off I went to my store to get a few things I needed.  As soon as I entered, the first bin I saw was being loaded up with fresh ears of unshucked corn.  Eight ears for $2 sounded great to me, since a couple of weeks ago they were six ears for $2, and they were delicious.  The young man doing the loading said I could pick straight from the boxes if I liked, which I did.  As I picked out my hefty corn ears, he proceeded to tell me how he likes to cook them.  Here's the best part.  They are so personable at this store!  After he told me what to do, I told him I was going to try it as soon as I got home and blog about it.  Airhead that I am sometimes, I forgot to tell him what my blog was or even get his name, but anyway, here's what he said to do:

Preheat the oven to about 350.  Remove the loose petals and fuzz on the ear of corn but leave most of the husk intact.  Place on a cookie sheet and put in the oven for about 20 minutes.  In his words, "it just cooks in its own juice."

Lemme tell ya, that was some really good corn!  It was perfectly cooked, and I didn't have to boil a huge pot of water on the stove.  You just have to shuck it the rest of the way after it cools off a little.  Not just a time saver, but a water and energy saver, too.  I can imagine the barbecuers of this world could have a blast playing with this idea.

So, there's my experiment of the day, brought to you by an employee of my now favorite store.

June 21, 2010 Why is the rum gone?

I don't know about you, but my weekend was just one party after another.  My dad lives pretty far away, so I sent him a lovely fruit bouquet, which I doubt lasted more than an hour after its receipt.  My son spent the weekend with his dad, so I was pretty well on my own, and that worked out well.

Friday's girls' night out was a better-than-standard bar room lush-fest, complete with requisite singing to the '80s, one really drunk chick that needed supervision (it wasn't me this time), and somebody who went dancing at the gay bars at 3 a.m. (also not me).

Saturday was a little more organized, but not without its excitement.  I belong to a group of people who like to play pirates and wenches on the weekends.  We dress up, pretend, DRINK, and throw parties just for the hell of it.  Surprisingly enough, we're pretty organized...for pirates.  We inaugurated our new leaders: President, Vice President (or president of vice, as she prefers to be called), Treasurer, etc.  It was hotter than Hades outside, but damned if we were going to let that stop us.  We had a barbecue and potluck outside anyway, dammit!

Even more fabulous is that the Bacardi reps were there, "teaching" us all how to make Mojitos, oh-so-refreshing and delicious drinks made with RUM!  It's a pirate/wench's dream. They even gave us free "mottlers" so we could keep doing it ourselves at home. Of course, you can go to Barcardi's website and find the recipe, but I'll paraphrase it here for you if you just don't feel like doing the work (you lazy goat).

In your cup, you squish (mottle) about half a lime, 2 large leaves of mint, add sugar or simple syrup, fill up with ice, add a shot of rum and then top off with club soda.  Yummmm!

Once the Bacardi girls were gone, along with the mint, limes and sugar, there was still rum left over (there should always be enough rum at a pirate event).  I got creative and decided to mottle some watermelon that was on the food table into my cup.  Then I added some spiced rum to that, and it was delicious, too.

Fortunately, this was a long-lasting event, and I had time to sober up before going two blocks over to my pal Melissa's place to sit and watch DVDs of True Blood until I was tired enough to call it a full night.  And I did indeed call it a full night.

June 18, 2010 Polish What?

My super-duper pal and favorite guzzling buddy, Melissa, comes from Pennsylvania.  Although she has become thoroughly assimilated in the whole Louisiana culture, I still listen to endless rantings about "back home we do such-and-such," and "you can only get good such-and-such up North."  If it's not enough that she's from there, her roommate is, too, as well as many other Yankee friends and acquaintances.

Never having been to Yankee-Land myself, there are things I've only heard about but never experienced: Special pretzels that couldn't possibly be replicated "probably because of the water" (that one came from her roommate, whom I've since dubbed "Pretzel-boy"); "authentic" pizza that even generations of Italians in the South don't know how to make right; a specific chicken marinade that tastes a lot like Italian dressing.  You get the idea.  Well, I feel the same way about so-called "Cajun" cooking anywhere else in the country, so I guess I shouldn't judge.

I focused on my friend's obsession with a thing called a pierogie.  I had never heard of one, much less spelled or tasted it, and it took all of her descriptive power for me to still not have a clue what it was or what it might taste like.  She and the other transplanted Yankees tried to tell me what it was, most of them being non-cooks, offering me the brand name of one that was sold in certain stores down here, etc., but I still had no idea whether I even wanted to try one.  This project is why my blog has been a little boring for the past couple of days.  It was a surprise, and Melissa reads my blog.

Since my friend was in Yankee-Land visiting family over her birthday, I decided to try my hand at making one of these elusive wonders to surprise her when she got back.  I found a recipe online and set about creating a pierogie.  It wasn't a difficult recipe, but I was missing some of the ingredients that I had to go out and get, and it was a bit of a learning curve to get all the steps right.

If you'd like the recipe, here's the link I used:  http://pittsburgh.about.com/od/recipes/r/pierogies.htm

After preparing the filling, mixing, rolling and cutting the dough, filling the dough with the filling, boiling the little ravioli-ish packages and then sauteing them in butter and onions, I finally had finished pierogies.  Only one problem.  I can't eat them. 

I had to find a Yankee native that could tell me whether this thing was any good or not BEFORE I surprised my friend with it.  I do at least pride myself on making good food, whether it is perfect or not, but I wanted this one to be a little bit more impressive.

I contacted another dear Yankee, Miss Kate, and asked her to taste-test the pierogie.  She wholeheartedly agreed.  I made the short trek over the river to present it for tasting, and she was most complimentary about its authentic taste and good flavor.  I solicited a few suggestions for improvement, which she gave and I took very seriously. 

Yesterday evening, I happily served my pal the beloved homemade birthday pierogies, and she was so grateful she ate 5 of them.  To a cook, that's the biggest compliment anyone could ever state in words.  She was so well stuffed that she barely had enough room for the chocolate mousse I made for dessert.  Good thing I had plasticware containers.